Time, once again, to catch you all up on the little anecdotes that make our life humorous and/or equally nerve-wracking. Cleaning out my little notebook and my phone and my iPod where I keep these little tidbits always brings a smile to my face.
I guess I should take the time, too, to explain the term ‘post-it note’. Because ... I've received questions. I call these little blips ‘post-it notes’ because they could easily fit onto an actual post-it note when in written form. In truth, that’s about the exact size of my little notebook that I tend to write them down on. I keep that notebook in my purse, along with my phone and iPod, of course - and I document these little things as they happen, or slightly afterward. So, chances are, if I’m with you and making a note of something ... it might just be about you. In a good way.
The purpose for them, of course, is because I don't want to ever forget these little conversations and comments that make up our everyday life. In the grand scheme of things, these are the things that my mind will forget. And so I preserve them. Because I don't want to forget the way these little things make my heart sing, or the way they make me feel. And that is grateful.
Incidentally, this installment of post-it note news is the first to highlight the antics of someone outside of the Thomases Three. I hope, for all the world, that they feel honored.
Judging by the size of this post ... these were long overdue. Enjoy.
***
During a trip to PF Changs last December, Brian and Stacy were casually discussing certain cons of the menu ...
Brian: “I’ve had squid.”
Then continues - mumbling - completely to himself: “It wasn’t good ... rubbery.”
***
While watching a video of Stephen R. Covey with Brian ...
Stacy: “Wow. He’s gotten old. He didn’t used to look that old. Did he?”
Brian, questioning her sanity: “Well, not when he was younger ...”
***
On one of the many mornings that Ammon insisted on waking up pre-5am ...
Stacy to Ammon: “Amm ... why did you get up so early this morning?”
Ammon: “The stars and trees with full apples that were scared.”
Stacy, pauses: “Alrighty.”
***
It’s no secret that Ammon has a ‘thing’ for blonde curls. He is slightly obsessed with a certain country-pop-Grammy-winner, known for her breakup ballads.
During a recent channel-surfing binge, Stacy ran across said heartthrob, and - because she loves his voice - asked Ammon who it was. He replied, with a coy little smirk and blush:
***
During the same said visit to PF Changs, Brian and Stacy were having a rather random conversation that led them to discuss all the many myths and urban legends that Brian ‘believes’ in. Bigfoot. Santa. Aliens.
Stacy pauses - surprised at the last. Then said, “Well, I guess you must. You believe in Optimus Prime, after all.”
Brian nods, then pauses. Leaning across the table, as serious as they come, he replies: “Actually, they are Autonomus Robotic Organisms. They have hearts.”
There was no comment from across the table.
***
While watching A Garfield Christmas Special - specifically the sausage gravy scene - Ammon turned to Stacy and very matter-of-factly said:
“They are making chocolate soup.”
Darling ... if only there was such a thing.
***
While they were talking about the new Transformers film, Stacy validated the fact that Brian would not see it if Peter Cullen did not voice Optimus Prime. Which he wouldn’t.
Brian: “It would be like ... um ... Brad Pitt portraying Edward.”
***
About her alleged indecisiveness, Stacy responded to Brian’s criticism by stating:
“Really, I just don’t want to take away others ability to choose. If that’s wrong, then maybe I don’t want to be right.”
***
During a recent run to Bed, Bath and Beyond, the Thomases Three passed a couple sitting down with a Bridal Registry coordinator. Brian proceeded to say - albeit far too loud:
“May the force be with you.”
It is still undetermined whether or not he was talking to the bride or groom.
***
Folks that know the Thomases Three well, will probably have heard all about the Door Nazi at Wal-Mart. Maybe you’ve met them yourself and felt the uncontrollable urges to punch something. During a particular late-night visit ...
Brian: “Is she at the door?”
Stacy: “She wasn’t when we came in. But I really don’t think it matters ... I think she just senses I’m here and just apparates.”
Stacy stops dead in her tracks, pauses, then mutters: “Did I just say ‘apparate’? In a regular conversation? Oh, dear ...”
And ... just to set the record straight ... guess who was at the door.
***
During a recent stop at Cracker Barrel on their way out of town, stomachs distended to all-new and terrible proportions ...
Stacy, in complete and utter discomfort: “I am so full. I feel sick.”
Grabs her fork and continues to devour her macaroni-and-cheese, and replies: “But ... I hate waste.”
***
Stacy, pondering the purpose, meaning and sanity of the ‘farmer’s blow’ ...
Brian: “I still do that in the shower. Let the humidity get it loose, then send it on its way!”
Stacy: “Oh, I know you do it. I can hear you on the other side of the house.”
***
Stacy, pondering spitting - and why men do it ... which led to quite the argument/conversation ...
Brian: “I’m just trying to prepare you for when your young son reaches spitting age. We grunt, fart, burp, spit, scratch ...”
Stacy: “But, why?”
Brian: “We’ve been doing it for millions of years!”
***
During a recent family stay-at-home date with pals, the Mitchell’s - Becky and Stacy were out running errands, while all the boys were left at the house. During a call home to figure out what the plan for dinner was, an exchange progressed to the point of distraction ... since no one wanted to be the one to make the decision. At one point ...
Brian Mitchell: “Oh no! We’re going through a tunnel! Can’t hear you!”
***
While preparing for a dinner/movie date with the Mitchell’s, Brian choose a movie that Stacy and Becky didn’t prefer to see. In desperation, and to make her slightly insane, a ‘discussion’ ensued about movie choices and dinner choices and why life had to be made so dang difficult in the first place ...
Brian: “Then let’s just go see Oregano!”
Stacy: “Excuse me?”
Brian: “You know! The lizard!”
Stacy: “Uh ... Rango?”
Needless to say, that didn’t help his arguement and Becky and Stacy made an executive decision.
***
It is common knowledge that Brian is an Apple user and iPad lover. Stacy knows of several that use other tablet-like products, like Kindles and Nooks - and love them. To each his own. She knows what the iPad can do, though - and often wonders why one would be drawn to another product - price aside. During a recent Barnes & Noble run, Stacy brought it up ...
Brian, shaking his head: “It’s elementary technology. They could do so much more. Those are like a big Texas Calculator!”
***
Imagine Stacy running around like a headless chicken (not hard). Imagine her trying to accomplish 31 things at once, when it’s only been proven that she can do 27 (easy enough). Imagine her trying to have a conversation with Brian, on the phone, while unloading the washing machine (that is already on her hate list) ...
Ammon, like his hair was on fire: “Momma, Momma, Momma, Momma, Momma, Momma ... Mommmmma, Mommmmma, Mommmmma ...”
Halfway up his mother’s leg by this point, he continues: “MOMMMMMMMMMMA!”
Stacy, frazzled, “WHAT, AMMON?!”
Ammon: “Cheese on the moon.”
***
When walking through Target, Ammon always seems to be drawn to the wrestling toys. Whatever they’re called. He has never watched wrestling – so the only guess as to why he likes these ‘toys’ would be because they are shiny and look despicably ridiculous. Brian and Stacy get tired of telling him that those are toys they will not own. So stop touching. One time in particular ...
Brian: “Uh-uh, Ammon. Monster Trucks are as far as we’re going to go in White Trash Land.”
***
While wandering around Islands last week, Stacy and her mom somehow found themselves talking about high school sciences and dissection ...
Stacy: “You dissected an oyster ... you dissected an oyster? What’s there to dissect?!”
Mom, matter-of-factly: “It’s mostly digestive ...”
Then continued: “... and honestly? Why we (as humans) eat them, I’ll never understand.”
5 comments:
I laughed so hard that there were tears. Thanks Stacy. That was awesome.I needed that.
I'm off to go google Chocolate soup. It must be out there somewhere.
I love reading your blog!
This was hilarious! Thanks so much for sharing. I might have to steal your idea and start a post of our funny random things. Love the white trash comment! Too funny.
becky ... if anyone could find it, it woul be you. and your certainly brave enough in the kitchen to make it. love you. :)
laci ... steal away! love you and miss you!
I haven't read it yet... But the title made me want to ask, "were they green?"
Okay, LOVED the white trash one. That's hilarious. And the "farmer's blow" was quite the revelation. I didn't even know what it was. Hahaha. It's amazing what married couples will admit to.
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